Why lose your Bachelor Life?

Simple question … Where did Marriage come from ?

From Wiki …
“Marriage is a social union or legal contract between individuals that creates kinship. It is an institution in which interpersonal relationships, usually intimate and sexual, are acknowledged in a variety of ways, depending on the culture or subculture in which it is found. Such a union may also be called matrimony, while the ceremony that marks its beginning is usually called a wedding.”


Why do people get married …
1. Just because 1000 ducks in a pond are white, 1001th should also be white. (Hope you understood, live with the herd or be a roman in rome, …. and a lot more … )
2. No more flirting around with Jerks and Nerds. Marry one … (And post marriage, you will become one among them, remember … )
3. Credit Card bill shoots like hell? (This is not a wise decision pal, you are aggravating your problem … )
4. Because they are bored of living alone? (What if you are forced to live alone post marriage, post a dual? )
5. Because your parents said to do so? (I am damn sure that they said a lot of other things. Did you ever follow them legitimately ??? )
6. Because you bought a new bike and the pillion seat is still empty? (Craziest thing … so is Marriage anyways … )
7. Emotional attachment, Love, …. Blah blah blah … (Definitely, go ahead. You should have experienced pre-marriage syndrome now … )
8. Did Chemistry work together? Or did something happen biologically with physique and physics aiding … LOL … !!!?
9. Legal stuff? Did you grandpa state that you will get a property worth a million dollars if you marry one of your blood relative with whom you were playing when you were at the age of 5 and admired her (At the age of 5, you have no right to do it now and no means too … ). (Royally Screwed at the cost of a million dollars).
10. Religious? Did someone say that you are true to your religion only if you get married and have kids? (Sure. Go ahead … No comments here …  )
11. Bored with your existing family? (Good choice. What if you get bored with this one too? )
12. Wanted to preach something which your dad preached you? (I know most of us would do it, knowingly or unknowingly. My dad did this to me, my dad told this to me, my dad brought me up like this, … and so on … All we need is to be a proud dad and push this to our kids … ROFL )
13. Because you wanted someone to monitor your fitness level and kill your tummy? (Of course, if she cooks, your tummy is gone. And never ever try to do the same to her. If you are planning to ask your partner to bring down her weight post marriage, that is suicide. Beware. Society demands them to be as round as a football post marriage. “Black Swan Theory” guys … ).
14. To be the center of attraction atleast for some time. (Good idea. Yes, Sarcastically speaking, very good idea. Don’t forget to call me for your party).

Where do you eventually end up?

1. Cinematic Romance (Falsifiability infact).
2. Quadrupled mobile bills.
3. Setting up unexpected expectations.
4. Pay housing loans together. (Good thing. You can do it till your kid goes for work and he will take it forward from there).
5. Buy a car, coz you will be 2+ soon.
6. Gain weight and spend money to lose weight.
7. Indulge in Spousal Support.
8. Enjoy loneliness and spend time with age old friends.
9. Hallucinate about gals who we could have married.
10. You start thinking too much about Society. Society makes you to get married, coz everyone did. In a Society, every family has it’s own feud, which they don’t propagate, but, expect others to get indulged in theirs too. … LOL … Society makes you to live together, Society is against divorce, and last but not the least, Society is always changing and fluctuating in nature.
11. Women compare Compatibility with their friends, when factually, compatibility is relative. (I didn't mean the Relation - Relative, but, the literal relative).

So, what is required?

1. Mutual understanding, mere hassle free co-existence.
2. No Expectations, coz, expectation kills.
3. No Comparison, ever.
4. No Ego.
5. Pure Affection.
6. Commitment to relation. You just feel and believe.
7. Know and understand each others’ pre-requisites and needs.
8. Respect for each other.
9. Flexibility and Cordiality.

Forwards always say this…

Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence--a life sentence.
Marriage is when a man loses his bachelors degree and woman gets her masters degree.

Don’t get petrified … Here goes some tips …

1. We live in a culture where “5-Star” (Tamil movie) daddies are abundant and society takes more precedence than individuals. (Had Woody Allen born here, it would have been a much different story. I am damn sure that he would have released as many as movies as he can every year). So, start writing poems like “Oh My Dear Love, you are beautiful as a dove, hot as a stove, delicious like a clove, caring like a glove, and so on … “. That is going to help out definitely.
2. Practice to say that Women bring “Luck”. (Don’t say Good or Bad. Don’t even think about it).
3. Save money for “Gold Class”es, “Delhi Dhaba”s, Mobile bills and Gifts.
4. Watch Tom and Jerry whenever you have time. That will help you in the near future.
5. Learn to admire what you feel is junk, literal junk. Your trade value boosts up.
6. Try to make new proposals on “April 1” (today), so that you atleast have a chance of escaping unhurt.
7. Love is blind, relationship is a hold and marriage is an adventure. So, be ready to wave your hands with a glue in it, in the darkness to move forward. It will be daring.
8. Don’t say “Wear your spectacles and watch again” when someone speaks about love at first sight. That is a grave gaffe.
9. Don’t try to bring up a dog at your house. You should know where you will be put in if your dog shuts its mouth and you make noise. A kennel is too small for a human to sleep, and beware, women love dogs.
10. Get accustomed to Sparks and Santros as women feel comfortable driving them. Invest on Scorpios and Fortuners only if you have money to buy an additional Spark 
11. Always be happy that you are the President of the house (Rubber Stamp) and your wife is just a Prime Minister (with all cabinets in her hand, especially finance).
12. And finally, when you are out of town, be careful while sending out messages …
Don’t send “Splendid place. I wish you were her” instead of “Splendid place, I wish you were here”. You will be royally screwed … !!! 